Learned: adding coconut oil to a fat-free lentil dish makes it way more delicious. The Movie “DOG” on Amazon Prime is pretty sweet character-wise, but highly unlikely, in my opinion. It feels good knowing it’s raining. 3.
3. Grateful for healthy elder parents. My mom’s appetite for learning. My dad’s apparent peacefulness. My desire to move my body. That I have more old friends that I know what to do with. That I can eventually lead myself away from substances that harm me. 3+3.
Seems: like I numb out and get in my head when I sit in a chair too long. Like my lymphadema is getting better. Like the daily journal habit is made more difficult if it needs to happen on an iPad. Like I need to take personal retreats to get to some of the neglected but important things on my list. 3+1.
New Habit(s): Black coffee. Going toward plant-based information for my body’s cells. Increase capacities slowly and they might stick. 3.
Accomplished: had black coffee long enough to forget what it tastes like creamy, so added so barista oat milk this morning and pretty nice! Had breakfast. Nailed down which digital stuff printer (including framed prints) to use. Pixel.com. 3.
Thinking about: “End of Indolence” game. How eating plant-based diet might actually make a difference and how it doesn’t have to be excruciating difficult to cross over. How to see people without driving. Whether I was ever naturally fast. I don’t think I was.
Video of the day: https://youtube.com/watch?v=DQKPe5xu0x0&feature=share
Reading: while on the plane the other day, started the new Michael Pollan book, “The Botany of Desire.” I got most of the way through the first bit, an in-depth look at the real “Johnny Appleseed” but I must have had my attention on the men in my row who were drinking heavily and laughing loud. They were in some kind of stage-hand business from the looks of things. Flight attendant for up-front was either trapped so went along with it, or enjoyed their banter and was genuinely engaged. Need to bring the noise canceling head gear next time.
A brief summary to let you know where I’m at:
I haven’t made a biographical update for a while but I need to. In the past few months, I’ve tapered off and gotten clear of the mind-body-altering drug I was given for my weird leg pains back around 2011. It worked for the legs and feet, plus it had the added benefit of making it easy to watch surgeries and horror films, something I could never do before.
For a decade plus, I just took Effexor and didn’t question. For eight of those years, extreme fatigue was my biggest problem, but I learned to manage life without much use of my body. I accepted my new status as a disabled person. I didn’t realize that I was in a bubble that included dulled emotion, intuition, compassion, libido, empathy and motivation. No wonder it was so hard to make changes! I had to think stuff up with that saran-wrapped head, and then get the sluggish body to do them!
Drugs that offer any desirable benefits are tricky to get free of. I have needed at times to lead myself away many substances, prescribed and otherwise, including cigs and booze. I understand how the world seems messedup us when so many of us don’t have the apparent strength to survive without alteration, or to function and cope when things like unwellness fall in our path.
I’m going toward health and longevity now. At 61, I am 70ish lbs. overweight and fairly weak, unsteady on my feet and can’t go too far. I need some-learn things like driving and cooking. It seemed like it was game-over for so long, I can’t believe I’m still here to say it. Time to go toward living well!
