This kind of nails it for me as far as what I think sexy looks like.
Learned: I’m a Daddy – it’s been confirmed. Shema won her game and got the new realm of possibility part we all so eagerly await. The Tattoos of Art. That I can justify my impulse purchasing with the word “Upgrading.”
3. My beautiful new oval covered casserole dish. The new fluffy pillows on my bed. The relative ease of this Monday. 3.
Seems: Like wow, have I taken a break! Like if I display that image of the man in the stilettos, everyone will know more than I want them to know about me. Like getting naked with someone creates a contract.
New Habit(s) that seem to be flying out the window: Take a break. Only drinking things with zero calories. Create and use a Sleep Ritual. Record intake. Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats. Smart Carbs. Lean Protein (at every meal). 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe.
Accomplished: Completed Shema’s Game the real way, with a series of questions. Got rid of 2 large cardboard boxes and kraft paper filler only to have another HUGE one come today, full of kraft paper! Received adapters for the A17 LED bulbs and tested – cool white, but keepers.
Thinking about: Not much. What to cook in my new casserole dish. How ladies shoes are just not for me. How much I love days where I don’t have to do much.
Q: I still need your answer about the otherly gendered shoes!
Mine: Obviously I’ve given this some thought. These would be more to live a professional life than to look “cool” – remember, I’m 55 years old and a size 14 in Ladies! “If I wore Ladies Shoes.”
Twins from some National Geographic article that I was obsessing about, finding all the instances in which the image worker messed it up.
Learned: that Vivitrol®, a drug used to help with opioid addiction, is marketed directly to judges who preside over drug courts, and becomes part of court-ordered treatment. How and when to fertilize and water the deck garden. Various things about Drupal & CiviCRM that I will forget by the time I need them again. YouTubeTV could be the replacement for Cable TV I’ve been looking for. My brother says I’m “excessive complacent” when I attempt to bring peace to chaos. The new dog who lives upstairs, Hector, has a noisy toy he likes to play with in the middle of the night.
3. Being accepting. Being accepted. That attention to detail can be let go of. 3.
Seems: Like there’s a special “Cat’s Away” freedom when one’s roommate goes traveling. Like it’s going to take getting new furniture to get me to change my lounging habits. That after all the possible scenarios, DA has found an elegant solution to replacing his touring vehicle for the month of August.
New Habit(s): Take a break. Only drinking things with zero calories. Create and use a Sleep Ritual. Record intake. Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats. Smart Carbs. Lean Protein (at every meal). 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe.
Accomplished: Scheduled two phone calls I was resisting due to their inherent spontaneous natures.
Thinking about: Changing Everything. Doing things I’ve never done before. Finding new furniture solutions to being comfortable around the house.
Q: If you were female, or male if you are female, what kind of shoes would you wear?
What novelty has taken my attention: I’m going to have to say “the computer” has eaten much of my attention over my lifetime, but the current novelty inside that domain is Instagram, which keeps sending me photos of the Obamas, white men with beards and tattoos, and handsome black men with beards. What algorithm follows me how?
From INSTAGRAM: “An Ugly Person-HAHAHA-oct 2011-resized” (This is the name of the file as downloaded)
Learned: It’s repetition that creates memorization. Oakland has something called “First Fridays.” A day off from all restraint can easily end in suffering. Instagram has some kind of algorithm to attract/pair my likes to them/their likes. Larry Pearson is leading a Forum, then a Special Evening (on the 16th), then an Advanced Course in August.
3. The ability to claim my freedom from and or to at any moment, knowing there is always new ground to take by doing so. Tikka Masala sauce. Witch Hazel pads 3.
Seems: Like I’ve lost momentum in the DAILY part of daily communication. Like my losing momentum create a clearing for others to lose momentum.
New Habit(s): Got caught up to five weeks ago. Something about taking a break, so I did! Create and use a Sleep Ritual. Record intake. Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats. Smart Carbs. Lean Protein (at every meal). 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe.
Accomplished: looked at www.creativelive.com. Nervousness, but also understood all the material that I could see being covered. I don’t need a class except as a structure to practice. I could teach a class.
Thinking about: Transforming. Larry Pearson as an experience I want for myself. The perniciousness of novelty. New habits that have gotten old. A new way of sitting and working. Keeping these a little shorter on purpose.
Q: What novelty has taken your attention away from what is important to you?
Last question answered: The beauty in unwanted circumstances, for me, is the test of one’s strength and courage to overcome one’s circumstances.
Learned: Whole black lentils are called urad sabut. “On One Effects” is supposedly a decent, free web-based image editor. You can make a request in the SFGH podiatry department to skip the student practice training and get the nurse to laugh, but the doctor will come in as soon as he can. Marcy has a lot of past and some dreaded future in the way of her moving forward with managing her life. Larry updated CiviCRM in the middle of the night, and removed and replaced one email address in response to a question that was mine to answer. Russian Television (RT) is operating in the U.S. under another name. I didn’t learn the assumed name. FCC and health care conversations on C-SPAN do not bring joy.
3. Learning to use the new 2-liter pressure cooker. Having the Dr. sign off on my toes for three months. Back to rehab mode. 3.
Seems: Like as Roseanne Rosannadana used to say, “If it’s not one thing, it’s another.” Like when the doctor says it’s good, you can say it’s good. Like Larry can’t keep his hands off of making changes that don’t need to be made and saying things that don’t need to be said. Like I’m not being Magical, Practical or Patient. Like I have no other way to be but pissed off when another hack steps in and starts hacking. Like there’s going to be trouble, followed by disappointment. Like I need to focus on being joyful, but I’m too pissed off and out of balance.
New Habit(s): The new one I still don’t know. If I made this easy, I’d just skip to the lesson which introduces it, so okay, I’ll do that, but after publishing this.
Start doing the lessons once a day (Make time).
Create and use a Sleep Ritual.
Record intake.
Plan Ahead.
Healthy Fats.
Smart Carbs.
Lean Protein (at every meal).
5 colors a day.
80% full.
Slow down.
Make time.
Breathe.
Accomplished: Dropped off specimen for urinalysis. Cooked edible lentils in new pressure cooker. Productive call with Marcy, which left her feeling lighter. Made it to 4500 steps, magically, right before going to bed.
Thinking about: Walking. Canceling 12:30 call and hanging on to being pissed. That I am afraid I’m going to be angry and say things I won’t be able to take back. Know-it-alls. How satisfying it will be to free myself from this volunteer position. Or maybe I’ll just tell it like it is. We’ll see. Compassion and love or straight from the hip? Choose. Dealing with the other specimen, but then I’ll be done. Dental X-rays. Where’s Patrick? Buttered toast.
Learned: The cardboard boxes piling up had become noticeable again. CS put on a yoni puja for all the crew women, but not a lingam puja for the men. KH is the art director for the FB animate your face app. He’s matured into a lovely man. LG thought I programmed the registration format. To show payment options, you must first select something with a price.
3. When others see things piling up and say something about it. Restoring basic workability to what was broken. Trying something new. 3.
Seems: Like I’m the only one who sees the accumulation of missed opportunities. Like one of the side effects of taking serotonin reuptake inhibitors is a lack of libido. Like not wanting to be on the phone much could be a problem. Like Instagram is dangerous for an image-hoarder like me.
New Habit(s): The new one I still don’t know. If I made this easy, I’d just skip to the lesson which introduces it, so okay, I’ll do that, but after publishing this.
Start doing the lessons once a day (Make time) by when?
Create and use a Sleep Ritual.
Record intake.
Plan Ahead.
Healthy Fats.
Smart Carbs.
Lean Protein (at every meal).
5 colors a day.
80% full.
Slow down.
Make time.
Breathe.
Accomplished: Cleared a few cardboard boxes. Had some free time. Had a beautiful reunion dinner with KH. Measured up to where I think I want the new kitchen shelves (80.25″) Trimmed ‘stache. Threw out some filed papers, including a bunch of tax-related mail (identifiers removed and soaked).
Thinking about: The honor of another’s company. Instagram. Rugged Elegance as a possibility. Forgotten libido. Having more toast.
Learned: GP bought himself a house. DA has a huge warehouse full of SpringPots and it’s still not enough! There’s a big fire up near Yosemite and you can’t get near it. Larry Pearson is leading the August Landmark Forum in San Francisco. JB’s aunt was one of the four women in the singing group En Vogue.
3. The ability to think myself out of the fog. Cardboard boxes. A day with no phone calls. 3.
Seems: Like for people of color in the contemporary mix, something is missing. Seems like it will take hundreds of years for people to stop seeing each other as things. Like giving yourself too much to do for long periods of time is abusive and can only lead to breakdowns.
New Habit(s): That unknown new one that I’ll learn this weekend. Create and use a Sleep Ritual. 1/2 a ✔ Record intake (was ✔now lapsed). Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats.✔ Smart Carbs.✔ Lean Protein (at every meal).✔ 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe. All the others. I need to let a few go.
Accomplished: Sleep between 12:00 and 6:00 with no memorable waking. Excellent conversations with KS, AJ & JB. Made it through yesterday. Cooked lentils myself that were pretty delish with a little more salt. Have started falling asleep earlier with less resistance.
Thinking about: Walk. Maybe a clue into my life’s purpose is to be a conversation for people to stop seeing each other as things. How nothing is wrong and nothing is right.
Q: What is the name of your newest friend (whether online, in person or otherwise), and when will you be in contact again?
My A: When I asked the question, I think it was a question of the memory, but it’s about the new connections that stand out as valuable. I have a new potential friend called art, but JB I would say is my most established new friend.
Learned: DA pestered to the point of speaking out against the inequality and lack of compassion in his relationship. My brother made a clay model of his cancer mass and got confronted, then got committed.
3. No emergencies. A light day planned. The lingering freedom from having all that stuff in the garage. 3.
Seems: Like I’m all out of love for the CMG and it’s time to move on. Like I’m working on forming too many new habits to effectively form new habits.
New Habit(s): The new thing I still don’t know. Create and use a Sleep Ritual (in progress). Record intake. Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats. Smart Carbs. Lean Protein (at every meal). 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe.
By the way, I’m probably doubling up on programs again, because my new Loop tracker habits are: Morning meds by 10; Drink Golden Milk before bed; Drink lemon water in the morning; exercise 15 mins; Plan Day; Journal what happened; listen to theme song/music; Daily Comm; 30 minute meditation.
What if I made this easy?
Accomplished: Sluggish results, but was a good support for my brother as he confronts his cancer face-to-face.
Thinking about: How I’m not feeling lighter. How I’m dependent on ibuprofen to stay out of debilitating sensation. New neck ache. Staying up later didn’t = sleeping later. How I will be able to get into the empowering context after moaning about a few more things.
Q: What is the name of your newest friend, and when will you meet again?
Reading: haven’t finished “The Bell Jar” but started “Radical Remission” and “Unbreakable.” Also, THIS which has words and video. One of my favorite humans.
Learned: How to be patient with leg-aches. How to VPN properly, and when to not. The basics of Farro. Mattress sizes. Balanced pH level refresh and that I need to raise mine higher to be healthy. Loop Habit Tracker. Watermelon is low acid, so I’ll make watermelon water. That Woodkid puts on a great show, with or without Son Lux. Toes take longer to heal than I thought.
Seems: Like the left leg is up to its old tricks. Like today I might be able to do more than yesterday. Like the magic happens from preparation. Like lines can be drawn to connect or to disconnect. Like it’ll be okay if it works out differently than envisioned. Like making it easy equals buzzing all my hair off with clippers, which could backfire. Like I could absent-mindedly forget the most important things. Like the world of easy produces the world of hard/difficult.
New Habit(s): The new one which I don’t know yet, but Loop Habit Tracker will make it easy. Create and use a Sleep Ritual, which I have been doing. Record intake. Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats. Smart Carbs. Lean Protein (at every meal). 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe.
Accomplished: Scheduled and had nice call w/PB. Rested and healing toes. Can not going off the deep end be an accomplishment? I say yes. So many of my accomplishments fall under the category of “I didn’t start and that’s the breakthrough.”
Thinking about: Short Walks. Call w/PB. Making stuff that’s hard easy. How I normally dislike lemon water. How easy it can be to create world with words, and how hard we can make it seem.
Q: “This thing I invented that I’m now struggling with… what was the compelling reason/empowered context that had me start it in the first place?”
My A: THEE most important thing for me is self-care and playing the parts of my game that I can do. There are other things I could do in life, but the most important thing NOW is to tend to my actual well-being.
Reading: Nothing new here. I read little bits more than full books.
*Why “F: Daily Communication?”
The original design was simply to share what there is to say. We (DA and I) started this by texting, but the history was looking like it was interesting enough to retain for the future, so we wanted there to be a more accessible record. We started using Gmail and kept to one thread, but when we got to 100, it wouldn’t allow us to go any further under the same subject, so we added an “A:” to the beginning of the subject “Daily Communication” so we’d have 2600 more to go before needing to invent a more elegant solution. Today, we are at #72 of E:, so we still have 2128 to go before the end of Z:.
This coat of arms was created for ‘Baron’ Charles Philippe Hippolyte de Thierry, who styled himself many things, including king of New Zealand. British Resident James Busby, concerned that Thierry was planning to come to New Zealand and attempt to become sovereign ruler of the country, brought together a number of northern chiefs in 1835 to sign the Declaration of Independence. Thierry’s coat of arms shows Māori warriors holding a taiaha and musket, and a crown atop the centrepiece. The motto is ‘Tenax, strength and harmony’.
Learned: A tiny bit of the history of New Zealand. How to use my new 2-liter pressure cooker. A brief but thorough history of GW, a houseguest I’d never met before. Felt tip pens bleed through my current note pad’s paper, rendering half of each sheet useless. I’m unclear about the value of bundled cable tv and internet, and afraid to make a potentially money-saving change.
3. Ibuprofen. Purell. The convenience of having things delivered. 3.
Seems: Like The Whitehouse is staffed with a bunch of pathological liars. Like switching to Sonic for internet will be a good move. Like when I have a house guest, I can take better care of them now, but still no determination to feed them. Like having a dog as a guest could be okay if only I let go of my concerns about stink. Like I’m a bad host if I don’t cook for my guest.
New Habit(s): There’s another new one, but I need to: Create and use a Sleep Ritual. Record intake. Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats. Smart Carbs. Lean Protein (at every meal). 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe.
Accomplished: Sent WU. Walked to and around the Grocery Outlet sans walking stick, finding sources of lean protein, good quality cheeses and Healthy Choice Fudge Bars, my current favorite kind of popsicle. Learned how to use my new 2-liter pressure cooker. Found replacement lights for under the shelf above the kitchen sink. Called the Cable Company and got what’s so. Knocked it down by $12 a month.
Thinking about: The clog of too much media in my world. Pending dental work and how it all depends on me. Will my toes heal? Is the chlorophyll still working, or do I stink? The impact of lying.
Q: What is THEE most important thing you are playing at today?
My Answer: I want to say something else, but it’s my personal well-being. I got leg aches. That’s my body communicating “Knock it off!” I will take it easy, stay off the stilts, and eat good things.
Reading: Same stuff as before, but reviewing “A Thousand Words for Joy” by Byron Katie. Would like to finish something soon. Listening to a lot of Sam Harris on YouTube.
Learned: When I say I have too many structures for fulfillment, I’m not kidding. Now that I’ve made super-chunky strawberry freezer jam, I don’t really see where I’m going to use it.
3. 275. Toe surgery healing correctly. The way pecans in bread look when sliced. 3.
Seems: Like I have been on holiday, then came back to breakdowns and outbreaks. Like when I’m kept waiting, I have to deal with not being actual royalty. Like when some things go right, it really must be dumb luck vs the power to create. Like I might be doing that thing where people shop to cope with stress/anxiety. Like I start to feel nervous if there isn’t some kind of “treat” in the house. Like I can still loose weight if I overeat a little, just not with white flour and/or sugar. Like if I go public with these, I’ll need to initialize everyone’s name for anonymity. Like I’m trapped in a never-ending recovery program.
New Habit(s): Another new one and I’m behind again. (So breathe, then make time.) Create and use a Sleep Ritual. Record intake. Plan Ahead. Healthy Fats. Smart Carbs. Lean Protein (at every meal). 5 colors a day. 80% full. Slow down. Make time. Breathe.
Accomplished: 275. Did not infect toes by being too lazy to bandage & soak. JB getting his game structured, to play at becoming more disciplined in the areas of health, finances, and artistic expression.
Thinking about: Walking more once my toes are more healed. How this woman in the waiting room comment on how “clean” I seemed to her. How I’m starting to pass out earlier, with no inducements.
