Learned: When I start being impatient, I lose the listening. I can run a pretty good small open source breakout session if I put just a little thought into it first. A bunch of global and local statistics about HIV & AIDS from one of the Docs who has been in the fight from the very beginning. 3.
3. Patient painters. Patient Friends. When I can tell I’m being impatient. 3.
Seems: My game ends soon and it seems like nothing happened. Seems like if I keep up the practice of cleaning my face with the potion and applying the cream, my skin will get better. Seems like NB will never get better and I’ll end up being the help he needs without getting the help I need. 3.
The Three Questions: (that I forgot over the weekend)
Ask “What if I made this Easy?”
Ask “What about this is REHAB?”
Ask “What if I made this Important?”
Desirable Habits: (TOP THREE by Priority and for readability.)
✔︎Do things you normally wouldn’t do.
✔︎ Seek out and pursue opportunities for TRUE REHAB.
✔︎ Embrace community while putting self-care first.
Note: If you start a conversation, have a way to remember that it’s still active.
Thinking about: How to care for myself and my caregiver without the help of my caregiver. When rehab really starts, will I really do it? When I was young, I didn’t want to like artwork like the kind Andrew Wyeth made. 3.
On-purpose ways of being: Courageous, radical and confronting. Forgiveness, peace, freedom and unconditional love in the background.
Accomplished: Moved desk in bedroom, vacuumed and dusted behind. Went grocery shopping again. Took the venlafaxine level down to 37.5mg from 300mg a few months ago with no jagged neuropathy pain (yet). Slept a lot.
Q: What’s something you say you’re going to do that you never get to, but still want to say you will do it?
My Answer: First thing comes to mind is those super-cleaning behind furniture jobs or repainting the bathroom trim, but I know it’s deeper than that. More mañana.
Video:https://youtu.be/y0V-1dYYI2s a short about an
Andrew Wyeth show in Seattle, followed by
https://youtu.be/jNuGbKIoUds , an hour-long documentary on Andrew Wyeth and his world from the BBC.
Watched: Law & Order SVU latest episode. Munchausen by proxy syndrome. Interesting. Also, SuperBad, because those guys were so cute and dorky.
Finished Reading: “Echoes of My Soul” by Robert K. Tanenbaum (my father’s kind of story). Took longer than it should have and put me in nap-mode almost every time. Was irritated with the incredibly long epilogue and postscript. Not my cup of tea.
Wanting to get back to reading: “We Were Eight Years in Power – An American Tragedy” by Ta-Nehisi Coates, and “Hands of Life” by Julie Motz.
Clay, Loved your comments about not wanting to like the art of Andrew Wyeth when young. Reminded me of the last 10 years or so when I had to change my mind about music genres. I was so-so on folk and really down on CW. Then we went to the Ozark Opry (we stayed in a timeshare at Lake of the Ozarks and bought tickets for the show). I realized that the genre was less important to me than the musicianship. Had to get down off my high horse! Just another small step in owning my own arrogance. Would be interested to hear what shifted for you.
Dario
To love a painting is to feel that it is not an object but a voice.
~ André Malraux
Dario, I would like to try to answer that. It probably is mixed up in the letting go of that identity I created to survive, the avant-garde bohemian outsider artist. I had to be weird, listen to weird music, hang out with other weird artists and only truly love art that was difficult to figure out or hard to be with.
Thanks, buddy. Not an unsurprising evolution for a smart person who came of age in a certain time and place. There’s really a tale to be told in both our stories about inherited conversations. I neglected to mention earlier that I grew up with a mother who had been trained in the classical canon of music in the 20s and 30s, Went to my first opera at 15 and listened extensively to classical music when I wasn’t tuned in to beep-bop-a-lula, ‘cuz that’s what we did as teenagers in the 50s and 60s. Then came to jazz, since it was really the most in the 70s and 80s for a certain class of intellectuals. We all had toolkit certain things and cultivate certain tastes to fit in with our peeps!